to often i am to close to this world.
a very large part of my wants to be friends with so many people,
to reach out and love my sisters and brothers, to allow people to see
who i am.
constantly i am broken into peices as i sit, stare and gawk at the
relationships that are forming around me.
everyday i realzie how much i was not born into this world,
that in my newness i was born into a world that is very much separate from
from who i now am.
in these moments of realization i couldn't be more happy, feel more full,
know that i am complete when i shut my eyes and allow myself to escape into
the only relationship worthy of every moment of my time.
i've been allowed to see the heart of women, of men of myself. to know that when i just want to
shreek about the glorious relationship i have that many, often myself, will look at me oddly,
question my love with scripture, urge me to examine myself.
psht, i say.
i'm going to go absolute, insanely so far out there crazy.
as i humble myself in admitting my own pride, inability and lack of friends.
as i cling to the one who gave it all, for me, who has equipped me for each moment,
who desires to know me utmostly.
so i dare to pray to know God like Adam knew God.
because you will always let me down.
you, woman, will never listen to me as much as i need to be listened to.
you, teacher, will never allow me to do as my heart fully desires.
you, husband, will spit in my face when i most needed a kiss.
you, human, man and woman.
"i've tasted Your glory,
and i left it there,
you poured out Your mercy,
and i didn't care.
still You loved me.
nothing compares to what You've done for me."
Prodigal- by Michael Gungor Band